Wednesday, August 4, 2010

How Important is Sex?

Below you can watch the latest episode of The Business Report. In this particular video we discuss the importance of sex in today's relationships. Andrea and I had totally different opinions on this topic. She thinks that sex is extremely important and I happen to disagree. In my opinion, sex should not be the focus of any relationship or it is destined to fail. After speaking with a couple of male friends who had great outlooks, I decided to write this post. I have a great female following on this blog so your input is requested as well. Please watch the video below and then read on for the perspectives of a few friends of mine.

So did you enjoy the episode? I sure hope so... After the video was posted, we got a lot of positive feedback and people were eager to share their opinions. One guy wrote the following message to me:

"Sex is important to me, but only if I'm in a relationship. I became celibate last year because I wanted to have a better understanding of what I truly want in a woman, and how much I truly value sex. Casual sex just didn't do it for me. The best sex I had was when i had a strong connection to the girl and just one touch would make her tremble, this is not because I'm that dope in bed but its because the attraction was completely beyond the physical. When done right, it can only magnify how you feel about a person for the better but most times it DOES complicate things where both people aren't on the same page."

All I could say was "wow" in response. I wish more men thought this way. Society encourages promiscuous sexual activity. Musicians sell it to us and we buy it in abundance. So how can we expect people to not think sex is important in relationships? I wish more people would pay attention to what's important as opposed to what we see and hear in the media. Another response I received was from a gentleman that I happen to have a crush on (LoL) and he simply stated he knew that relationships could never work with women who tried to jump his bones early in the relationship. He also went on to say the the larger the focus on sex is in a relationship, the less time it will last. I totally agree. People get bored and cheat for the purpose of finding sexual satisfaction so an emotional connection is necessary.

This topic is so multifaceted and can be looked at from multiple angles. To sum it all up, I still rate the importance of sex in relationships a 3 and I know that the only way that a positive bond can be formed is with the absence of sex for a prolonged period of time. This way, you'll know that you truly care for the person and sex will just be an added bonus.

Thanks for reading,

Alexandria B.


  1. Very mature perspective. That's why God commands sexual purity before marriage. People tend to look at this command as a joy-kill or a freedom-encroacher, when in fact it's designed so that the joy and longevity of sex and relationships will be maximized. He knows us best because He created us, right? I like what homeboy said about sex being so much better when there is a firm foundation/connection already established; spiritual, emotional, mental, social, then physical.

  2. I love your blog! Thanks for the comment!! I would have to say that if I had to rate sex on the scale of 1-10 for it being important in a relationship it would be a 5 simply because sex should not be the number one factor as to why you are with a person. I've had to learn the hard way but at the same time I believe if I made sure that sex was not super important then maybe I would have had successful relationships. If you have a connection the sex would be powerful I totally agree with what he said, it wouldn't necessary matter if he's good or bad because like you said it's a learned thing. Nothing is worse than being with a guy and the only thing you have in common is sex and the only time you see each other is to get it on. Can you say BORING!!I think a lot of people are thinking like you and your friend and because a lot of ppl do it's easy to relate to you guys! I love this post and the vids!!

    ~♥ Miss Nic♥~

  3. The importance of sex? Hmmmm, maybe a 6? Because it can break a relationship if it's bad (let's be honest). And sex also has the power to trick you into thinking you have a good, solid relationship when its sooooooo good. But once you take sex out of the equation, it lets you see where you really stand.

  4. I love how you write :)
    And I'm with MizSerious, I say sex is like a 5 or a 6, like generally. But in the relationship that I'm in with my partner, it's like a 3 or 4, because everything else is so perfect that sex is an added bonus--especially with me being gone for a year, now.


  5. I think it is definately important to an extent - although it is sweet when a guy says that he would rather spend time with you that have sex. hmm

  6. Great post! I love that you two were so honest on the topic. I have to agree more with you, Alex, because I do think the compatibility factor is much more important in a relationship. Great sex does not a great relationship make... but it's an awesome bonus. ;)

  7. how important the sex in the relationship is depends on the type of relationship u want to have. if you want to have a long lasting relationship based on how much u relate* then sex is just another something. if u want to have brief sexual encounters sex is more important and the substance isn't. for sex to be important in a long lasting relationship one somebody is going to cheat or both have to be equally sexually adventurous and knowledgeable.

  8. I'm looking for a girl who understands that I am a child of God and love my lord and savior jesus christ and will not be having sex until I'm married,it's not just not an act I'll do just to do.If she respects that then we are going somewhere,no ones perfect but I'm lookin for a proverbs 31 woman.